I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
