sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
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Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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