my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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