I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
