We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize