U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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