Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize
