R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
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