is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Is Oprah even human
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
