i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
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Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
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Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize