I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Randomize
