whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
