She's JV to your varsity
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
