windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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