So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
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