Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
His nipple licking is glorious
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