Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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