I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
