Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
wow bdsm is so cute
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