i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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