You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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