I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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