Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
