five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
