She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
