She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
