no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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