Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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