i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
