omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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