Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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