I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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