Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Alive.
So much puke
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize