We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize