Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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