Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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