White coat. Heels.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize