I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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