Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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