Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
