Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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