you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
