is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
