can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I need moral support for this bender
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
