I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize