I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
