Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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