Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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