I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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