idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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